I'm sure there are many questions running through your head right now so I will do my best to explain how we arrived at this point in our family and what the future process entails. I have written this post in question and answer form. These are the questions we have been asked the most and hopefully this will provide some answers and give you some insight into this exciting process.
Question 1: What made you decide to adopt?
When Michael and I were dating we of course had the "how many kids do you want" talk. The Lord had already worked in our hearts as single people to give us the desire to adopt one day. That desire made the "kids" talk that much more exciting as we spoke about adoption and our hope to adopt one day. This is a desire that the Lord has grown in us over the past 4 years of our marriage. There have been a few times in the last 4 years that we have said "ok let's start the process." But for whatever reason (I like to think of it as divine intervention) we would put it off.
As many of you know we had the wonderful opportunity to visit my sister and her family back in December. That trip gave us some wonderful quality time together as a couple and I think also gave us such a great perspective on the world and how we can be globally minded even in our own family here in the US. January was the month we said "let's do this" and it has been truly amazing to see how God has thrown open so many doors and we have already been surrounded by such love and excitement.
We also firmly believe that God has called us to adopt as we have read scripture. We ourselves are adopted into the family of God and feel called to welcome a child or children into our earthly family just as God graciously invited us into his through the death and resurrection of Christ. We believe that adoption is such a beautiful earthly picture of what Christ did for us spiritually. There are multiple passages in scripture that helped us in this decision. Here are just a few:
Romans 8:5 - For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!”
Galatians 4:4-7 - But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son,born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.
Jesus speaking in John 14:18 - I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.
James 1:27 - Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.
Question 2: Why Ukraine? Why international?
Amazingly enough this was a very easy decision. Once we chose the agency we wanted to use (see next question for those details) we looked at the international countries they offered for adoption. We felt led to eastern Europe and Asia. As we read the various descriptions for each of the countries listed, our hearts went out to the many orphans in each of these countries. But when we got to Ukraine, we just looked at each other and knew that was where God was leading us without even saying a word.
The majority of the girls and boys in Ukraine who are not adopted enter the ugly world of prostitution and drugs. When I say majority, I am talking around 70-80%. This broke our hearts and we knew that we had to at least save one if not more from such a life.
Some of you may ask why we chose international over domestic. I can't say that we have a definitive answer to that question other than we felt the leading of the Holy Spirit directly to Ukraine. We believe that international and domestic adoption are both so very important and we applaud and cheer families who do both. For us, we know our future child(ren) are in Ukraine waiting to be brought home with their forever family.
We have the opportunity to adopt sibling sets in Ukraine. We are very open to this which is why we say child or children. We are excited to see where God leads with this. The minimum age of adoption in Ukraine is 5. If we get a sibling set we could get a second child that is older or younger than that.
Question 3: What agency are you using?
The agency we have chosen is Lifeline Children's Services. This agency does both domestic and international adoptions. Their main office is located in Birmingham, Alabama with multiple branches in other states including North Carolina. Lifeline is a gospel based agency whose mission drew us in immediately. A quote from their website states:
Lifeline is here to help the Church respond to the
command in James 1:27; “to care for orphans and widows in their distress and to
keep oneself unstained from the world.” We acknowledge the church is the Bride
of Christ, and while our Staff, as believers are discipling, equipping, and
engaging people to care for the fatherless, it will ultimately be accomplished
in and through the Bride of Christ- His Church. Lifeline seeks and prays for
missional families who understand that this journey is so much greater than our
own plans, time frames, and desires, and who ultimately want God’s Glory
in the end.
After speaking with people who have used Lifeline and with members of their staff, we knew Lifeline was the agency God had placed in our path for this process.
Question 4: How long will it take?
The adoption process for Ukraine can take anywhere from 12-18 months. This includes the home studies, creation of our dossier which is then sent to Ukraine and finally a trip to Ukraine to choose our child or children. We may be in the country anywhere from 30-60 days depending on what city/orphanage we are assigned to. Once all the paperwork is filed we then get to come home with our new family! We wish it could be faster, but this will not be a sprint; it will be a marathon and we will need your help.
Question 5: How can we help? (At least we hope you asked this one :-))
First and foremost you can pray for us! Pray for both of us as we enter this journey that will have many bumps along the way, that we will have patience and continue to rely on God. Pray for the staff we work with at Lifeline as they seek to do their job and help us in this process. Pray for us as we raise the funds for this adoption...it isn't cheap :-) Pray for our future child(ren) who are most likely already on this planet and living in an orphanage even as I type this. Pray that their heart(s) are prepared to be adopted and ultimately to be adopted as a child of God. And if you think of anything else...pray for that too...we aren't picky :-)
We will also have some fundraising events through out this process. We will keep you posted on that front because we will definitely need some help!
Ok, so that was a long post...I'm sure your eyes are tired, I know my fingers are :-) Hopefully this post gave you an insight into this journey we have just begun. We look forward to sharing more and more with you as we proceed. Thank you already for the prayers I know so many of you will lift up on our behalf. We are truly grateful!
Our next post will be about how we told our parents. I promise that one won't be as long :-) Love to you from a very cold Wake Forest!
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